Friday, June 2, 2017

Mets a :Lovely Girl in 1963, Courted 14 years...

M E M O R I E S: Life and Time of Pastor Rudy Bernal, his Glimpses on History & the People’s Struggle for Freedom

Chapter 33- Mets a Lovely  Girl  in  1963,  courted, won and developed her close  friendship for 14 years, until 1977. But a  Palm Reader & Numirologist told me,  me earlier,  I will never marry a girl from Panay Island. And it happened. Why?

Some months  after  our palm reading  sessions with my board mates in Iloilo City  with the strange  woman in 1962, I was in the bus from Carles going to Iloilo City.  In one of the towns, a young girl came in as  passenger.  She was alone.  There  were many passengers in the bus. I was setting  near  the bus entry, with one seat vacant. 

 She sat beside me. I looked at her and smiled. She smiled back.  I introduced myself. I extend her my hand. I told her:  “My name is Rudy Bernal. I am studying at CPU. A  Second Year College. I am glad we met here in the bus.”   She told me her name.  She has a  beautiful and  unique name. Only  two letters.  She said: “ I’m studying  at Iloilo City Colleges. La Paz Unit. I’m  4th Year High school.”

She’s pretty. And lovely.  She has beautiful eyes. She’s slim. And toll. A nice complexions.   As the bus travels, we continued our  conversations.  I asked  her address and telephone. She wrote it for me. A few days later I called her by phone.   We have a short conversation. A  few weeks later,  I wrote her a letter. She answered me.   We have some exchanged letters. I visited her a few  times in her boarding house.  We became friends. Just friends.  About a year later, I went to Baguio City and  enrolled  at Saint Luise University  that summer. Then, I proceeded to Manila and enrolled at Lyceum of the Philippines.

Before, I left Iloilo I  visited her. I said:  “I will leave for Baguio in two weeks time. If I liked the environment there, I will stay. If not I will go to Manila. I will write you a letter. Please always answer me”.  She just smiled.  A few weeks after I arrived in Baguio City, I wrote her. She answered.  By that time,  she was already  2nd  Year college.  In  Manila, we continued  writing our  letters. I wrote her quite long letter. She wrote back, with short letters.

After her graduation in High School she went to Iloilo City Colleges (ICC). She took BSE. She wants to be a high school teacher.   When I have a chance,   I  visited  her In Iloilo City.  We developed a  strong relations   even when   we’re far from each other.  I loved and respected  her.  I think,  she loved and  trusted me.

One time, while she was  Second Year in College, I wrote her to join the Kabataang Makabayan in Iloilo City.  By  that time, KM  has  become a very strong student movement in Iloilo. She wrote back:  “ No. I am concentrating on my studies. I am a member of two  student organizations already. I do not want to join any other student group.  Thanks for inviting me.”  I respect her decision.  By that time, 1969  KM was a legal, getting to be a  militant student movement.  It has become a social and political force in Iloilo and Panay Island.

When  boys were young,   they often have  crushes with several girls. This was also true with girls. Our  young lives were also  searches  for the right  girl and boy. It was a kind of adventure for young lives.  I have  several crashes.  And my girl friend  has also several suitors.   This were natural among young people.
 
Despite the distance, and some  fleeting relationship  in Manila,  my  girl friend in Iloilo  continue to be my   love.  We continued  with our letters. Sometimes, with a telegram, on Special Days.

After graduating from her Education course,  my  girl friend  went to Manila.  A very close friend of her family  was  living in Manila. She was  a lawyer  with the Comelec. She stayed with her.  She planned to work in Manila and tried to apply with the DepEd.   I visited her often. One time, we went to Baguio City  with her brother and  neice.  After  several months of trying to find teaching work in Manila, she decided to go back to Iloilo. There was a job waiting for her  in    She took the opportunity. She applied for the teaching job.

 A strong  typhone hit northern Iloilo.  She told me  she was accepted to teach in high school.  She also told me that the students were in hard situations. Some have their classes under the trees. By that time, I was close with Teodoro Valencia, one of the most influential  newspaper columnist  in Manila. He was  with  Manila Times. Teodoro Valencia, called us at  Agence France Presse every evening.  He was one of our clients. One of us news editors, would  read to him the  15 most important international news that we received at AFP.  From this  news  reports,   Teodoro Valencia  got ideas for his  comments on International news.

I asked Mr. Teodoro Valencia if he can helped  the school  where  my girl friend  was teaching.  But I did not mention her name. Only the village and town  in  Northern Iloilo, so that the students can have  a  classroom  and   not sat under the tree. I told Teodoro Valencia  on the phone: “ The students  badly  need a classroom. It was damaged by the typhoon. They held classes under the tree. Please talk to Congressman Aldeguer and asked his help about this problem.” Aldeguer was the Congressman of the 5th District of Iloilo.

The next morning,  Congressman Jose M. Aldeguer,   read his Manila Times at his home at 7:00 AM. He saw, the column of Teodoro Valencia, saying some students were studying under the trees in northern Iloilo. Teodoro Valencia, hit  Congressman Aldeguer in his  column  for not moving fast and  helping the  school children  in Northern Iloilo. I was told, Congressman Aldeguer was fuming with anger. Imagine, all Congressmen, Senators and top leaders of the government all over the country, saw that a classroom in his district in Iloilo was not taken cared of and some students attend classes under the trees. 

Congressman Aldeguer send men to investigate who was the culprit who wrote  Teodoro Valencia of the situation in the school. The school principal and the Barangay Captain were  called  and asked questions.  But they did  not knew anything about it. And no one knew anything about it.

Congressman Aldeguer immediately ordered to re-build the  classrooms that were  destroyed and students would not  hold  classes anymore under the tree.

My girl friend wrote me a letter. She told me she cried. She said in her letter. “I asked your  helped. I   did not asked you to criticized any body.”

I learned a new lesson. But that’s  how powerful columnists works. Their written words, spoken at the right time and situation,  makes powerful politicians move fast and also decisive action.

While teaching in high school, she pursued her post graduate studies. In about 3 year time,  she finished her  Master’s  Degree in education.    She was decided to  to go up the stairs  in the Department of Education and Cultures.  Then, she took up a doctoral degree.

The distance between Iloilo and Manila,  we bridged  with letters and  long distance calls.  Sometimes, I visited her in Iloilo.   She’s  lovely girl.  Intilegent.  Decisive. And also strong willed.  She  was crowned once,  Miss Iloilo City Colleges.  We thought we’ll  marry each other.    We’ve talked marriage.  She’s a catholic. Quite devoted.  I am a Baptist. When I am in Iloilo  we worshipped at Jaro Cathedral.  I took some theological course.  But by that time,  I was not planning to go to the ministry anymore. I have stopped after 1 & ½  year  in the College of Theology.

On passing we also  discussed marriage. We  thought of a simple ecumenical wedding. Perhaps, officiated by a Catholic priest and a Baptist minister.    But   we’re waiting for  an opportune time.

We have a good relations with my girl friend  in Iloilo. We have never have some kinds of quarrel. But one time, I made quite a big mistake. A crush that moved  fast. It have nearly destroyed our relations. She learned of it.  She got angry with me. But his voice were soft. She told me not the see her again . I went home very, very sad.  Three days later, I visited her at her home in the town.   She came.  We met in the sala. But she gave me a letter.  She returned  our  engagement ring I gave her some years before. And she returned  all the letters I wrote her the last years.  She kept it and all were intact. Idid not accept the letters. I told held please kept of the moment.  It   was  painful. And I knew, it  was also  painful for her.

In her letter,  she told me:    “I trusted you. I have a very high and strong trust in you. But it crushed like the Ruby Tower.. Please do not see me,  ever   again."

I remember Ruby Tower. It  was residential apartment about 8 stories high in downtown Manila. It crushed  like a house of cards. Many residents lost their lives in the crush of the building.  It was  one  of the strongest  earthquake  that hit  Manila. I cannot remember the date, perhaps, 1966. The retrieval of the dead was hard to see. There were few who survived.  But the longest survivor, was a boy or a girl,  that was buried for more than 10 days, inside the room where her parents died. But survived.

I left forlorn. But I decided not to surrender. I will court her again.  After a few weeks I visited her. We have a short conversations. And again, I visited her.  Slowly,  our  lost relationship was regained and restored. And we become more closer.

This time, I was trying to   get a job.    I got interested in poultry – started chicken and turkey  raising.   I have  bought a poultry incubator, kerozine operated,  which I  used to incubate chicken eggs and turkey eggs which we cared. I have started to raise Turkeys. One time, I have  nearly a  hundred Turkeys roaming the vacant hills. I bought about 600 hundred meters of Chicken Wires and worked with my younger brother. We will go into small business together.

I  am a failure  in my studies. I have studied in 3  universities – Central Philippine University  in Iloilo City in 1961-1963;  Saint Louise  University,  Baguio City in Summer of 1964.  And at   Lyceum of the Philippines in Manila in 1964 -1967.  But I   have not finished my course. There were times, when my grades  the whole semester were  .50 (failure), dropped or Incomplete.

I  have resigned from a good job as News Editor of the Agence France Presse.  And I involved   in the   activists works.  Then I joined   a   labour  union in Iloilo, helping in education and organizing  farmers in  different  parts of Panay. 

I got suspected by the military. I was raided  and arrested at CPU College of Theology and brought to the police headquarters.  I was  allowed to go home. Then  some months later, I was raided  at home  in Cawayan, Carles  and brought to the Philippine Constabulary headquarters in Sara, Iloilo.  

I tried to find job. But in government, I need to have a  clearance   from the military and NISA.  The situation was a bit hard.

My  girl  friend   continued in her studies. By that time,  she’s  nearly finishing her doctoral studies.   She has a stable job. She was moving up in her career. And,  I was unemployed.  Trying hard to start a business.

But a circumstance I have not considered came in my life. Without planning for it, I was  called as Assistant  Pastor of  Cawayan Baptist Church. I put much of my time in it. I learned some experiences in pastoral ministry. Then, while I was visiting a friend in Bacolod City, God opened the way, where I was called by Maao Central Evangelical Church as their pastor. Rev. Esfe Tandog, introduced me to the church President.

When  I accepted the call of   Maao Central Evangelical Church as their pastor, I realized a new barrier had come to our life.  My girl friend for many years was a catholic girl. Quite a devout catholic.  And, she would be marrying a Baptist pastor?

But our lives have changed. I am now a Baptist pastor.  She’s  a devout  Catholic. It was not a problem, if I am a layman. But I am now a  Baptist pastor, working in a  Baptist Church. She was in continues growth of  her career. I am down economically. My  salary as Pastor was very  small.  She was finishing her doctoral studies. And  I have not finished a college degree.    I felt it would be  unfair  to her,  if I pursue  my love and  marriage with her,  under  our different  circumstances.

I thought of seeing her and discussing things with her. But I also hesitated. There were hesitations  on my part. I try to see how things will developed. But, one day, I went to Iloilo City. I decided to see my girl friend. I will discussed and talked with her our situations. The changed situations of our lives. 

I came to visit her on her birthday. I did not tell her I  will come.  I took my chance. I took a  boat from Bacolod to Iloilo City.  I arrived at her boarding house, about 5:00 PM.  When I arrived, she has a visitor.   A  handsome man. He was   visiting my girl friend on her  birthday.   She introduced me to the man.  We have some conversations, the three of us together. I stayed for nearly three hours, sharing some thoughts with each other.    The man also stayed. I silently prayed that he will leave. But he did  not. He stayed for more than 3 hours.   After about 3 hours,  I asked  my girl friend, I will go ahead.   I told her I will see  her another time.

The following day, I went back to Bacolod City. When I returned to Maao Central Evangelical Church, I kept thinking of our encounter there.  I know my   girlfriend was being  courted by a good man,  a police officer.  She will be in   good  hands.  She would have,  also a   better future, economically  with him. I prayed for God’s guidance for us, together.

I began to remember the  woman palm reader.  He said, I will never  marry a girl from the Island of  Panay.  The girl I courted several years, since  she was 4th year  high school,  in Iloilo City, was from Panay.  And  my girl friend was  now   courted by a good man, a gentleman,   close friend of one of  my best friends in Iloilo City.    I thought, if she knew, I am married, she  will  accept  this man’s  proposal for marriage,  too.

I  decided to court  Hesther. It was a  soft and decisive courtship.   Hesther was a close friend to me.  She assisted  me on my writings. She was a helped  in  some works , I need to do.   After two months, she  accepted my proposal for marriage.  Then, after two more months,   we  were  married.

A   months later,  my friend was  a  sponsor in a wedding at Baptist Center Church in Iloilo City. There, she met my former girl friend.  She asked him about me. They have a short conversations.   My friend told her, I was married  a  month earlier in Bacolod City.

About  three   months  later,  my former girlfriend also got married. She married a  police officer. He loved her. He had a very high respect and care for her.    They lived a good marriage life. They got   children.  Their children are now also working.  God had blessed their marriage. And  blessed their lives. There are things that God will not gave to us. He has some other plans for us. And God’s plans were always good.

I got married with Hesther in Bago City, Negros Occidental on April 1978.  The Palm Reader told me in 1962, I will never marry a girl  from  Panay island.  Negros and Panay Islands were close to each other. It’s only 1 hour ride  with fast boats today. Yet, there may be situations in life, where  the future were  pre-ordained, including the woman whom we will  be married and her  residence.


My  younger sister, who decided to go teaching in high school, and  pursued her masteral studies, later  became a very  close friend of my former girl friend.  

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