Chapter 12 - Met a Lovely Girl in 1963 & Won Her Love

                                                      Chapter  12

                    Met a Lovely  Girl  in  1963,  Courted   & Won Her Love

A   Palm Reader, in 1963,   told me. “You will not marry a girl in Panay Island.”  It came true. I married a my wife, just two , 2 hours away by boat, in Negros Occidental. 

                     

Some months  after  our palm reading  sessions with my boardmates in Iloilo City  with the strange  woman in 1963, I was in the bus from Carles going to Iloilo City.  In one of the towns, a young girl came in as  passenger.  She was alone.  There  were many passengers in the bus. I was setting  near  the bus entry, with the next seat vacant. A woman setting besides  me a minute ago, has gone down. 

The lovely girl  sat beside me. I looked at her and smiled. She smiled back.  I introduced myself. I extend her my hand. I told her:  “Miss, my name is Rudy Bernal. I am studying at CPU. A First Year college.  I am glad we met  you.” ”   She told me her name.  She has a sweet smile.   And she has a beautiful and  unique name.  Quite  strange. For her first name has only two letters. I thought her mother, who chose the name for her, was  really creative and wise.   She said.  “I’m studying  at Iloilo City Colleges. La Paz Unit. I’m  4^th Year High school.”

She’s pretty.  She has beautiful eyes.  Slim. And toll.  And toll. A nice complexions. And she has a sweet, soft  husky voice.  As the bus travels, we continued our  conversations.  I asked  her address and telephone.  I  gave her  my small address book. She wrote it for me. A few days later I called her by phone.   We have a short conversation. She remembers me well. A  few weeks later,  I wrote her a letter. She answered me. 

We have some exchanged letters. I visited her a few  times in her boarding house.  We became friends. And slowly our friendship grew.   About a year later, I left my studies Iloilo  and went to Baguio City.

Before, I left Iloilo I  visited her. I said.  “I will leave for Baguio in two weeks time. If I liked the environment  there, I will stay. If not I will go to Manila. I will write you a letter. Please  answer me, always”.  She just smiled.  A few weeks after I arrived in Baguio City, I wrote her. She answered. By that time,  she was already   2nd  Year college.  In  Manila, we continued  writing our  letters. I wrote her quite long letter. She wrote back, with short ones.

In Baguio City, I wrote her with some  picture of Baguio which I have taken. We continued our communications.  I went  down to Manila, I continued writing her. Our love developed. Sometimes, I go to Iloilo and visit  her.   It was a love,  made beautiful and sweet with distance,

When I have some chances,   I flew and  visited   her in Iloilo City.  We developed a  strong relations   even when   we’re far from each other.  I loved and respected  her.  She loved and  trusted me.

One time, while she was  Second Year in college, I wrote her. I invited her to  join  Kabataang Makabayan (KM), which was started  in Iloilo City.  By  that time, KM  was becoming a  strong student movement.   She said in her letter.  “Thans for inviting me.  I am concentrating on my studies. I am  already a member of two  student organizations . I do not want to join any other student groups. “

That was his cript answer. I respected her decision.  By that time, 1969  KM was a legal and   militant student movement.  Soon,  it also became a strong  social and political force in Iloilo and Panay Island.

When  boys were young,   they often have  crushes with several girls. These were  also true with girls. Our  young lives were also  searches  for the right  girl and boy. It was a kind of adventure for young lives.  I have  several crushes.  And my girl friend  has also several suitors.   This were natural among young people.

Despite the distance, and some  fleeting relationship  in Manila,  my  girl friend in Iloilo continue to be my   love.  We continued  with our letters.  with  telegrams, on Special Days.

After graduating from her Education,  my  girl friend  went to Manila. She stayed with a very close relative – lady lawyer with  the Comelec. I visited her often. She told me, she had applied for a teaching job in DeptEd Iloilo. But she applied also in Manila.  She’s waiting which will come first.  Her applications with DeptEd in Iloilo was accepted. She  returned  immediately ot Iloilo and started her work in high school.

A few months in her job,  a   typhoon hit Iloilo. It was a strong typhoon. Many homes and some school  buildings were destroyed.  Her classroom was also destroyed.

She wrote me. “A strong  typhone hit northern Iloilo.  I have also started teaching.  Our school building was hit hard by the typhoon. Some rooms were  blown down.  Some classes were held under the trees. If you have a way, please request Congressman Aldeguer to assist us.”

By that time,  I was closed to  Teodoro Valencia, one of the most influential  newspaper columnist  in Manila. He was  with  Manila Times. Teodoro Valencia, called me at  Agence France Presse every evening.  He was one of our clients. I always read to him. 10 most interesting news from around the world, which he can use on his commentaries. 

I asked Mr. Teodoro Valencia if he can help the school  where  my girl friend was   teaching.  But I did not mention her name. Only the village and town  in  Northern Iloilo, so that the students can have  a  classroom  and   not sat under the tree. I told him on the phone.  “The students  badly  need a classroom. It was damaged by the typhoon. They held classes under the trees. Please talk to Congressman Aldeguer and asked him to help the students get their classroom.” Jose Aldeguer was the Congressman of the 5^th District of Iloilo.

The next day,   Congressman Aldeguer,   read his Manila Times at his home early in the morning.  He saw, the column of Teodoro Valencia, saying some students were studying under the trees in northern Iloilo. Teodoro Valencia, hit  Congressman Aldeguer  for not moving fast and  help the  school children  in Northern Iloilo.

I was told, Congressman Aldeguer was fuming with anger.  Imagine, all Congressmen, Senators and top leaders of the government all over the country, saw that a classroom in his district in Iloilo was not taken cared of and some students attend classes under the tree. 

Congressman Aldeguer send men to investigate. He wants to know  the culprit who wrote  Teodoro Valencia of the situation in the school. He thought it was his opponent in politics. The school principal and the Barangay Captain were  called  and asked questions.  But they did  not knew anything about it. And no one knew anything about how the story reached Teodoro Valencia. 

Congressman Aldeguer immediately ordered to re-build the  classrooms that were  destroyed so that   students would not  hold  classes anymore under the trees. The Congressman really moved very fast. The classrooms, destroyed by typhoon in the village were immediately  repaired.

My girl friend wrote me a letter. She told me she cried. She said in her letter. “Rudy. I asked you for help. I   did not asked you to criticized anybody.”

I did not answer her immidately. I kept silent for a week.  I learned a lesson. How powerful columnists works. Their written words, spoken at the right time and situation,  makes powerful politicians move fast and make  decisive actions.

While teaching in high school, she pursued her post graduate studies. In about 3 year time,  she finished her  Master’s  Degree.    She  decided to  to go up the stairs  in the Department of Education and Cultures.  She took up  her  doctoral  studies..

The distance between Iloilo and Manila,  we bridged  with letters,  long distance calls and visits.  Often,  I visited her in Iloilo.   She’s a  lovely and loving  girl.  Intillegent.  Decisive. And also strong willed.  She  was crowned,  Miss Iloilo City Colleges.  We thought we’ll  marry each other.    We’ve talked marriage.

She’s a catholic. Quite devoted.  I am a Baptist. When I am in Iloilo we worshipped at Jaro Cathedral.  I took some theological course.  But by that time,  I was not planning to go to the ministry anymore. I have stopped after 1 & ½  year  in the College of Theology.

We have a good relations with my girl friend  in Iloilo. We have never have some kinds of quarrel. But one time, I made quite a big mistake. A crush that move fast. It have nearly destroyed our relations. She learned of it.  She got angry with me. But her  voice were soft. She told me never to see her again.   I went home very, very sad.

Three days later, I visited her at her home in the town.    We met in the sala.  She gave me a big envelop.    She gave me  back our   engagement ring. She gave back all my letters that she  kept  intact for years.  I felt the  pain. And I knew, it was also painful for her. 

I did not accept the engagement ring she returned. I did not accept the love letters I wrote her that she was returning.  I reuested her to just keep it. I will get it sometimes later.

In her letter,  she said.   “I trusted you. I have a very high and strong trust in you. But it crushed like the Ruby Tower. Please, do not see me, ever, again.”

Her conclusion was hard and painful.  “Please, do not see me,  ever, again.”   It gave me the strength and power to move on. It moved me to start and  court her again!

I remembered  Ruby Tower, was residential apartment about 8 stories high in downtown Manila. It chrushed  like a house of cards. Many residents lost their lives in the crush of the building.  It was  one  of the strongest  earthquake  that hit  Manila. I cannot remember the date, perhaps, 1966.

The retrievals  of the dead  was hard to see and remember. There were few who survived. But  many have died.  The longest survivor, was I think, a girl who  was buried for more than 20 days, inside the room where her parents died.

I left forlorn. But I decided not to surrender. I will court her again.  After a few weeks, I visited her. We have a short conversations. And again, I visited her.  Slowly,  our  lost relationship was regained and restored. And we become more closer.

This time, I was trying to   get a job.    I got interested in poultry – started chicken and turkey  raising.   I have  bought a poultry incubator, kerozine operated,  which I  used to incubate chicken eggs and turkey eggs which we cared. I have started to raise Turkeys. One time, I have  nearly a  hundred Turkeys roaming the vacant hills. I bought about 600 hundred meters of Chicken Wires and worked with my younger brother. We will go into small business together.

I  am a failure  in my studies. I have studied in 3  universities – Central Philippine University  in Iloilo City in 1961-1963;  Saint Louise  University,  Baguio City in Summer of 1964.  And at   Lyceum of the Philippines in Manila in 1964 -1967.  But I   have not finished my course. There were times, when my grades,  the whole semester were  .50 (failure), dropped or Incomplete.

I  have resigned from a good job as News Editor of the Agence France Presse.  And I involved   in the   activists works.  Then I joined   a   labour  union in Iloilo, helping in education and organizing  farmers and fishermen  in  different  parts of Panay. 

I got suspected by the military. I was raided  and arrested at CPU College of Theology and brought to the police headquarters.  I was  allowed to go home. Then  some months later, I was raided  at home  in Cawayan, Carles  and brought to the Philippine Constabulary headquarters in Sara, Iloilo. 

I tried to find job. But in government, I need to have a  clearance   from the military and NISA.  The situation was a bit hard. 

My    girl    friend   continued in   her  studies.  By  that  time,  she’s  nearly  finishing her doctoral studies.   She has a stable job. She was moving up in her career. And,  I was unemployed.  Trying hard to start a business.

But a circumstance I have not considered came in my life. Without planning for it, I was  called as Assistant  Pastor of  Cawayan Baptist Church. I put much of my time in it. I learned  new skills and  experiences in pastoral, evangelism and development  ministries. Then, while I was visiting a friend in Bacolod City, God opened the way, where I was called by Maao Central Evangelical Church as their pastor.  Rev. Esfe Tandog, introduced me to the church President.

When  I accepted the call of   Maao Central Evangelical Church as their pastor, I realized a new barrier had come to our life.  My girl friend for many years was a faithful and devout Catholic girl.   And, she would be marrying a Baptist pastor?

But our lives have changed. I am now a Baptist pastor.  She’s  a devout  Catholic. It was not a problem, if I am a layman. But I am now a  Baptist pastor, working in a  Baptist Church.

Another thing. She continued her educational and economic growth. She’s at the top of her career.   I am down economically. My  salary as Pastor was very  small.  She was finishing her doctoral studies. 

And  I have not finished a degree.  For, again I stopped in my schooling.   I felt it would be  unfair,   if I pursue  my  love and  marriage with her,  under  our different  circumstances.

I decided to see and talked with her. I somehow, hesitated.  Then, one day, I went to Iloilo City. I visited  my girl friend. I will discussed and talked with her our situations. The changed situations of our lives.

I came to visit her on her birthday. I did not tell her I  will come.  I took my chance. I took a  boat from Bacolod to Iloilo City.  I arrived at her boarding house, about 5:00 PM.  When I arrived, she has a visitor.   A  handsome man. He was   visiting my girl friend on her  birthday.   She introduced me to the man.

We have some conversations, the three of us together. I stayed long for  sharing some thoughts, three of us, and  with each other.    The man also stayed. I silently prayed that he will leave. But he did not. He stayed.   After about 3 hours,  I told   my girl friend, I will go ahead.   I told her I will see  her another time. That night, I kept thinking. And praying.  I asked guidance from the Lord. I began to feel,  the man could be  a good husband for my girl friend.

The following day, I went back to Bacolod City. When I returned to Maao Central Evangelical Church, I kept thinking of our encounter in Iloilo.   I knew my   girlfriend   was serioualy  courted by a good man,  a police officer.  She will be in   good  hands.  She would have,  also a   better future, socially and economically  with him.  I prayed for God’s guidance for us, together.

I began to remember the  woman palm reader.  She said. “You will not marry a man from this Island…in Panay.” 

The girl I courted and girlfriend for many years,  since she  was 4^th year  high school,  in Iloilo City, is  from Panay.  And  my girl friend is   now   courted by a good man, a gentleman,   close friend of one of  my best friends in Iloilo City.    I thought, if she knew, I am married, she  will  accept  this man’s  proposal for marriage,  too.  Or, she may have accepted her proposal already.

I  decided to court  Hesther. It was a  soft and decisive courtship.   Hesther was a close friend to me.  She assisted  me on my writings. She was a helped  in  some works,  I need to do.   After two months, she  accepted my proposal for marriage.  Then, after two more months,   we  were  married.

A   months later,  I met a friend.  Also Baptist minister from  Iloilo City. He was sponsor,  in a wedding at Baptist Center Church. There, he met my  girlfriend. She was also a sponsor in that wedding.   She asked my friend about me. They have a short conversations.   My friend told her, I was married  a  month ago,  in Bacolod City.

Three   months  later,  my former girlfriend also got married. She married the   police officer. He loved her. He had a very high respect  for her.    They lived a good marriage life. They got   children.  Their children are now also working.  God had blessed their marriage. And  blessed their lives.

 There are things that God will not gave to us. He has some other plans for us. And God’s plans were always good. And it will prevail.